Now that we know it's a boy the first question everyone asks is "do you have a name picked out?" The answer is yes, we have names picked out but no, we don't have the name picked out. Mike and I are coming at the whole name thing from two totally different points of view and are having a really hard time agreeing on something. I like traditional names and/or names that are passed down in the family; Mike likes unique names, names he thinks are "strong" and almost what I consider to be trendy, something I'm not into. It has become a very stressful thing for us, deciding on a name.
I think in some ways it is part of being girly that you pick out names for your future kids and I had some names that I've always loved or always imagined giving to my child. But it is a whole different ball game when a 2nd person becomes involved. It isn't just my child and it isn't just my opinion that counts. And with it being a boy I think the father ends up with more of an interest in what to name his son.
I have a fairly common name with an uncommon spelling and can't ever find anything personalized that has my name spelled right. People I've worked with for years can't even spell my name right (and even some of my family members)! I want my children to have nice normal names that will allow them to buy whatever souvenirs they want and that they won't have to constantly correct people on how to spell it. Mike has a very common name and there were always a dozen other Mikes so he wants something unique that will stand out in a crowd. I am named for 2 sides of my family and love the idea of passing down family names. Mike is named for a man that really has nothing to do with his life and does not have ties to any names that he wants to pass to his children (including his last name which he may be changing but that a whole other issue entirely) We have clearly conflicting ideologies.
We've looked at baby books and websites. We tried to go the traditional Irish route and as much as I love the idea, I didn't really love any of the names. I like Michael Patrick (for Mike and my dad) and he doesn't want to name our son Michael. He likes Broderick which to me is a last name and makes me think of Ferris Bueller. He picked out Brayden and I fell in love with Brayden Michael but then he decided he didn't like it because Brayd or Brady were unacceptable nicknames. He suggested names like Blaise, Bryson, and Mike Cole (which he says sounds like Michael when you say it fast and I don't know why you wouldn't just name him Michael if that's what you wanted it to sound like...) all of which I don't like. At all. Then he suggested Ryder and I'm kind of ok with it so we are toying with Ryder Patrick or Ryder Martin but I don't want to start really liking it in case he changes his mind again. And neither of us love it or think "yes, that is the ONE".
My Grandpa has thrown out some gems like "Bacteria", "Prime Meridian", and " Risotto" which are funny but not helpful at all since they are really just nouns. Everyone we talk to has suggestions and opinions. The whole thing is just really stressful. You have to consider nicknames, initials, will there be a million others with the same name? And he'll have this name his whole life, it's really important to pick a good one. Mike and I have even gotten into fights about it, like true, yelling at each other fights. We just want totally different things. I just keep hoping we'll stumble upon that perfect name, the one that just feels right for this little boy, the one I can imagine hearing when he is playing hockey or graduating college or putting on his business card. I feel like having a name picked out will help us bond with him even more before he is born. And it is really important to me that we both agree on the name, not just one of us giving in to the other. It needs to be a name we can both live with for our son. I'd like to think these are realistic expectations but the more time that passes and the closer we get to his birth, the more I wonder if I'm asking too much and should just go ahead and pick something, anything, so he has a name. I'm sure we'll have a few more fights over it and eventually we'll agree on something. Until then he will continue to be our little Bean.
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